Sincerely Remorseful

There can be little doubt that a male adult who has demonstrated his utter lack of moral fibre, and who has, through that demonstration lost public respect and worse, the trust of his intimates, must of necessity feel remorseful. Most individuals in those circumstances would dearly love to turn back the clock and given the opportunity, resist the temptation that overwhelmed their moral fibre. To restore to themselves the trust of those who surround them, and bring themselves back to social respectability, normalcy and comfort.

An apology is always a good idea. An apology that is truly heartfelt and that describes the anguish of the wrong-doer at the knowledge of the pain he has brought to others through his rashly stupid actions has resonance. And it begs forgiveness. If it is genuine, authentically real, it is difficult to utterly shun the wrong-doer. Charity has its place. If the crime is not too egregiously unforgivable. Assaulting a teenage girl in whom an adult male's children have complete trust and affection is a pretty low blow at civil social behaviour.

Saskatchewan Roughriders general manager Eric Tillman pleaded guilty to sexual assault which occurred when he forcefully embraced a young girl trustfully tasked with the care of his young children. A young woman who for a year had tended to the needs of those children. "She is wonderful to our children, our children adored her, she had a great relationship with my wife, and I think it's been documented throughout all of this, we treated her with absolute respect the year that she babysat for us..." said he.

"I take full responsibility for my actions, and my emotion today is for other people that I know have been impacted." That sounds mature, responsible, and sincere. The man has caused great harm, he has repented, he truly regrets what he has done, on many levels; forfeiting trust and the comfort of affections. He apologized to the girl and to her parents who as any parents would react, must have been horrified, outraged. He apologize to his wife, his parents. All of whose trust he spurned in a single irretrievable impulse.

He even apologized to himself in reflection of the "incredibly painful" experience that he caused himself to undergo. That must be the final word in empathy. How will he react at some future date when his children become old enough to be curious about their father and want to know everything about him, and then discover this disordered event that occurred when they were young, that would explain why the babysitter they were so fond of suddenly became unavailable?

What will they make of his having explained "This would not have happened in a hundred million years had I not put myself in the position to be on medication"? Ah, it was not their father who erred, for he was not in full possession of his senses, and submitted to the pressures that the medication imposed upon him. They robbed him of free will. Took away his ability to discern right from wrong. Led him to assault a young girl for the pleasure that he took of it.

"Nevertheless", he averred, "My heart goes out to [the victim] and my apology is profound." So says he? His apology is profound? How profound?